Just read an article about why men don't like to date, claiming they have too many fears to overcome.
Women are like this, too. We're fear central. A pocketbook -- no, more like an Encyclopedia --of insecurities and eccentricities. And, most women don't really do the whole datin' thang.
Relationships these days feel like a race, or a competition:
Woman 1: "Hi."
Woman 2: "Hey, what's your name?"
Woman 1: "Tina. You're hot."
Woman 2: "So are you. Wanna sleep together?"
Woman 1: "Sure, wanna move in with me tomorrow? I had a fight with my roommate who is my ex girlfriend...had to kick her ass out last night."
Woman 2: "Awesome. I'll bring my dog Scooter. Let's visit my parents in San Fran next week?"
Woman 1: "Aight. We can swing by Vegas and get married. It's not that far."
Woman 2: "Why not, I've always wanted to do that. Oh, I just looked up an adoption agency on my phone. I put our names down. You're Tonya, right?"
Woman 1: "Tina, but that works, too!"
Okay, so I exaggerated a little bit, but you get the idea. But some of you might be thinking, "Lauren, I'm sure the article makes a few valid points when it comes to men that don't apply to women as well."
Hmm, welp, here are a few of the fears mentioned in the article --
Fear #1: You'll Come Between Him and His Friends.
Ladies worry about this all of the time. (Look up The L Word.)
Fear #2: You'll Soak Up All of his Free Time.
I loves me some free time.
Fear #3: You'll Pretend to Be Sane and Turn Out to Be Crazy.
If I had a nickel for every time I heard a lezzie say this...
Fear #4: You Won't Respect Him.
It's all about the R-E-S-P-E-C-T. Well, at first.
Fear #5: You'll Be High Maintenance
Oh goodness, who doesn't worry about that, squirrels and transsexuals included?
Let's be real. We all have fears and concerns when it comes to love and dating. Is this person going to hurt me? Am I ready to date? Can I actually be in a healthy relationship? Am I good enough?
Do they like me?
I get it. I do. But, we have to be able to go slow and live in the present, especially us young peeps. We gotta be able to take each person who comes into our life as a new experience, not one from the past.
And sure, we may go too fast or too slow (men and women). Sometimes I may misread the signs or give mixed signals, but in the end, it's all about being the best person you can be.