Obama Goes Parental on General Motors.

Okay, President Barack Obama is flat out, after my father, the greatest guy on this planet. Today he asserted unheard of government control over the auto industry by bluntly rejecting turnaround plans by General Motors and Chrysler and forcing General Motors CEO Rick Wagoner to resign.

Sniz-nap!

I don't care what anyone says. Our president is a bad m-f and I fully support him. He basically told General Motors to go screw themselves and that, if they want his money, they gotta follow his rules first. And the first rule is to get rid of the private jet flyin', over paid CEO since he's not helping the cause anyway. Seriously, Barack is a smart, honest, good human being.

It's refreshing and beautiful to watch after Bush. I feel like this man is going to change this country for the better in ways we will come to realize decades from now. As a young person, I feel like anything is possible again.

If only he could take a broom to the entertainment industry. We could use less of Lindsay Lohan and Octomom.

Lesbian Club - Pros/Cons

Going To A Lesbian Club

Pros
1) C**chie everywhere.
2) Usually a small number of butterfaces.
3) Always bound to see a famous person, usually from some reality show or "The L Word."
4) A great place for hot straight girls to go if they need some attention -- physical or emotional.
5) Have the hottest/sexiest Go-Go dancers and strippers (TruckStop).
6) Not many straight/gay guys.
7) Can always go home with someone, although they may smell very different in the morning.

Cons
1) Hormonal, moody pu**y everywhere.
2) They've all f--ked each other at least once in their head and twice in reality.
3) A fight will break out...almost always involving nothing at all.
4) You may see someone's mother with her new girlfriend.
5) Desperate 40+ year olds everywhere waiting to grab your booty.
6) Seeing the same goddamn women every week, also known as The Regulars.
7) Will always get a straight male tourist asking you for a kiss before he goes back to Greece or Azerbaijan.
6) Drama, drama, and more drama.

Valerie Bertinelli - Nice Body!

After losing over 50 pounds, Valerie Bertinelli's showing off her new body on this week's cover of PEOPLE Magazine. I am very proud of her and know that it was hard for her to lose the weight and will continue to be a challenge every day.

As a young person I also find this inspiring since I find it harder and harder to keep off the pounds. It takes effort, time, and strength to be disciplined and stay in shape.

(Photo found on http://www.realrocknews.com/wp-content/uploads/2008/03/valerie-bertinelli-book.jpg )

I give her mad props and know she's inspiring millions of people around the world, including myself. She, like Adam Lambert, make me realize that anything is possible if you try hard enough and always dream big.

Go Valerie!

A Conversation - Bars and Lesbians and Wine.

I enter the bar, sit my black ass down, and enjoy a glass of cabernet. It's fabulous. After an hour or so some ladies show up and I watch them from a distance wondering if they're into women or not. Then, after a few moments, I order another glass of wine. As I'm doing this, a gorgeous woman comes up to me and buys it. She's white, dark black hair, 5'10, thin, and cool as hell. We'll call her Miami.

Miami: "Wine, eh?"
Me: "Yeah, sometimes I prefer red over white. Depends on my --"
Miami: "You're gorgeous. Just stunning."
I blush, wishing I could hide in between her red lipstick and bright brown eyes. A compliment never goes unnoticed by my cheeks.
Me: "Oh wow, thank you. And, thanks for the drink. Where are you from?"
Miami: "Florida. Why are you sitting here all alone? Waiting on your girlfriend?"
Me: "I don't have a girlfriend."
Miami: "Why?"
Me: "Because I'm picky. Don't like a lot of games."
Miami: "Do I look like I play games?"
Me: "I don't know."
She looks me up and down. I look away, not being used to such frankness. I feel like a Picasso painting being put on display for the first time.
Miami: "Sorry if I am making you feel uncomfortable. I can't help it."
Me: "I'm fine. What's your sign?"
Miami: "Aries. You?
Me: "Aquarius."
Miami: "How old are you?"
Ahh, yes, the question. The question that always gets me in trouble. The question that always makes women gasp and then walk away in disappointment. Here we go. I pause, not wanting to say anything. She can sense my hesitance --
Miami: "Oh, that bad, eh? What, you're 30?"
Me: "...I'm 23."
Miami: "Wow. Well, it was nice talking to you."
I laugh. A laugh that has nothing to do with being humored or really thinking something was funny. A more of a "knew it" laugh to myself.
Me: "I totally understand. It's nothing personal."
But, she doesn't get up. Instead we continue talking for a while. We talk about where she's from and what I'm looking for in a relationship and in life. Turns out she's not only 38, but also a nice person. By the end of the night, she gets my number and asks me out to dinner.

PREDICTION
Here's what I predict Miami will do: I won't hear from her until maybe this weekend when she's slightly tipsy and less concerned about being attracted to a 23 year old. She'll flirt with me and ask me to meet her. More than likely, I will and kissing will go down. After that, she'll want to sleep with me. No. Hell no. A few days later, she'll send me a text saying, "I'd love to kiss you again." Then, I'll tell her she can on a date. She'll get scared by the thought of a date and I'll never hear from her again. End.

UPDATE
I never heard from her at all. A month later I saw her walking with a young girl. Turns out she had a girlfriend of over two years who isn't a day over twenty-five.

Intuition: it's powerful. I knew the moment I met her that something wasn't right. When you meet a guy or girl and it ain't feelin' okay, think about why that is and consider giving that some attention.

Barbara Walters - Too Old?

Word on the street is Barbara Walters is quitting "The View" this summer because she's feeling 'burnt out' lately.

(Photo found on http://www.exposay.com/celebrity-photos/barbara-walters-abcs-50th-anniversary-all-star-party-1C76RD.jpg)

Hmmm...

I think being 180 years old may have something to do with it, too.

Dating - You Asked Me Out, Right?

Let's say a guy asks you out. Do you expect him to plan the date?

I was asked out on a date and then, the night of it, asked to plan everything. This was my response:

Me: "Honestly, I expected you to plan out the date you asked me on. Would you like to reschedule so you have more time to figure it out?"

Okay, some of you may feel that is harsh. But, I think it's first date protocol.

I ask you out = I plan the date.

Isn't that the nice thing to do? I think it shows that I care enough to make sure we both have a great time. I can't help but feel like you aren't very interested if you haven't thought about the date you asked me on over three weeks ago.

I'm not sayin' rule out the person completely, but perhaps it's something to be cautious about.

If he isn't showing consideration now, what will happen when we're in a relationship? It's a valid question to ask yourself and one to keep asking for everyone you date.

Ever been with someone who showed a lack of interest and care, but totally turned it around?

A Conversation - Are Threesomes Okay?

So, a woman asked me out on a date last week. We are scheduled to go out tonight. After getting home from an interview today, I get this text from her --

Woman: "So, do you have any idea where you'd like to go tonight for our date?"
Lauren: "No, but I can figure it out if you can't."
Woman: "I'll have my husband figure it out."
I close my phone absentmindedly. What the hell is this chick talking about? Does it look like I want a freakin' threesome? Hell to da naw. I stare into the distance and before I know it, three long minutes go by as I figure out if I want to cancel the date or not.
Lauren: "Wait, you have a husband?"
Woman: "No. I'm kidding about the husband, momma. I have to get back to work. Talk to you later tonight."

Hmm, something told me she isn't kidding. Who the hell kids around about having a husband? No one...oh, unless ya got a husband, right?

I asked my friend what she thinks and she agrees. Says I should cancel the date. So, I send her a text back --
Lauren: "I can't make it tonight. Have a good day."

I definitely don't regret being honest, which saved me time in the long run and potential drama.

But, I'd love to know...what would you have done?