Friday, February 19, 2010

I'll Take Some Words.

Welp, I think it's obvious that I haven't been blogging as much these past few months.

I'd love to blame it on something tragic like cancer. Or, on something not so tragic, like getting a full-time job that has me so busy I can barely make time to sleep.

But, I will admit it here and now, that the main reason is because I haven't felt very inspired to write. And, I know there are some of you who are thinking, "Be real, gurl. It's because you were dating a hot mamacita." Sure, that may be part of the mix, but it ain't most of it.

Also, I figured out that since the conversations I blogged about were at bars and clubs, I had to always be there. Well, peeps, I haven't been out to a bar in a long time. As a result, I haven't had my usual conversations with other women and men.

(photo found here)
But, today's a new day. No more excuses from this point on. I'm going to keep on writing and staying inspired if it kills me. Well, not if it kills know what I'm sayin'. Sometimes we get off course in life, and I hope you're more forgiving than my grandparents who were very angry after not hearing my voice for a few weeks:
You know how this goes. I sigh --
I sit in my room talking to Wisconsin on the phone. It's a beautiful day outside and I am dying to go for a walk. I hear a beep on my phone and check it. My grandparents are calling. Time to switch on ova.
Me: "Hey grandma."
Me: "Uh...hello?"
Grandma: "Oh, you're alive. I tell ya, we never hear from you."
I think it has been three or four weeks, but okay...never works, too.
Me: "Oh, I'm sorry, grandma. I know it has been a few weeks, but I've just been going through a lot in --
She interrupts, not hearing anything I am saying. She has been waiting to lay into me.
Grandma: "We used to hear from you all the time. You used to be so good about that. Now you never call."
Me: "Grandma, I have always called you guys every week since I was a young girl. Come on now. That's not fair."
Grandma: "Look, I'll tell ya one thing. You better stay outta trouble. Stay outta them drugs and bars and quit that drinking."
Okay...since when did I start doing drugs and drinking? Her imagination has been running wild. But, I understand. She's worried that her jobless granddaughter is going downhill.
Me: "Grandma, I am fine. I don't do drugs or any of that stuff. I am taking care of myself."
Grandma: "Mmmhmm. I told your grandfather I wasn't going to call you. That I'd wait to hear from you, but I thought I would call anyway."
Me: "Okay, well thank you. I love you very much. How are you?"
Okay, good. We made up. Now she'll get off my tail.
Grandma: "Fine, but you should be better about calling us."
Spoke too soon I guess.
Yeah, my grandparents were a little harsh, but that's life. I know she was upset because she cares and is concerned. I share that conversation because it's funny and speaks to what a lot of folks are going through. Sometimes you'll face adversity and people, like family, who think you're not doing enough. My grandparents love me, but they'd love it if I moved home and got a job doing what I hated as long as it paid my bills. They don't care about my dreams or what makes me happy. Now, this isn't because they don't love me. It's because they're scared that I may fail and, in the end, all they want is for me to be taken care of.
I say to you and to me, be strong. Follow your heart and do what makes you happy. There will be those telling you to move back home or to give up on your dreams in life. Stay positive and know that you have a purpose on this Planet. We're all made up of incredible gifts and talents. We just have to bring them out, not tear them down.

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