Thursday, September 3, 2009

We're All Cars.

I think love is hard. Truly. But, being held should be easy.

You know how this goes. I sigh --

It's one of those nights where the moon overtakes the sky. I sit with a glass of wine in my hand plus some cheese squares. A Friend sits next to me with a glass of Vodka. Straight up.

Me: "...sometimes I don't know what I want."
He laughs, more to himself than at me. What's really in his glass?
Friend: "Join the club, babe. I wanted a peanut butter sandwich for lunch but ended up having a meatball sandwich instead."
Me: "Yeah, yeah, I get it. But, I'm talking about love and stuff like that. know, meeting women and dating can be tough."
Friend: "It shouldn't be."
Me: "True...I guess I'm referring to getting over your past experiences and moving on with someone new...without taking things out on them."
Friend: "That's easy. Just move on."
Me: "Okay, is today disagree-with-Lauren Day?"
He laughs, gives me a sweet smile.
Friend: "Look, I know what you mean. After Lisa I couldn't trust a woman for years. And damn, my mom issues didn't help."
He sighs. I wait, knowing he's going to add something else.
Friend: "Being with her took so much out of me. I don't even know if I can give that way again."
Me: "I feel ya, man. But hey, everyone has thangz...issues."
We both take a sip of our drink and let the night soak us up. The silence is nice. For this moment.
Me: "What if we didn't have any baggage or unresolved bullcrap that makes us screw up relationships?"
Friend: "Well, then we'd be different people. And come on, L, you know what they say -- "Our past makes us stronger."
We laugh. A little.
Me: "Right. I love to date, don't get me wrong. But, there's always that point where you gotta ask yourself, "can I let my guard down?"
Friend: "You mean be vulnerable? Yeah, women always want you to open up. It has to happen naturally for me. Wait, maybe I don't get it. Example?"
His eyes look a little cloudy. Too much Vodka.
Me: "Let's say you have a trust issue because your ex girlfriend cheated on you. Now, you feel like every woman will eventually do that. You're suspicious of the things she says from the jump."
Friend: "That's tough. I guess I would eventually go crazy and be sent to jail."
Me: "Very funny. I think I would be open and honest. Just tell her about my past and my previous experiences with it. And, hopefully, she'll be sensitive and patience with me if I am always communicative in a healthy way."
Friend: "Easier said than done. I wouldn't deal with a girl who has trust problems like that. I already have a boss on my ass everyday."
Me: "Good point. But, what if you're really, really feelin' her?"
Friend: "Then I'd hit it for a minute and quit it."
Me: "Damn."
Friend: "I'm just keeping it real."
I sit there forgetting my wine and responsibilities for a moment. I don't know if it was me or my Friend's blunt words, but I suddenly feel like none of this really matters in the long run. All we have is the Now. And right Now, life's lookin' pretty damn good under the moon.

No doubt, we all got thangz to work on. Some of us have a bad temper and others have a problem being too passive. We're all very different. But, it's not enough to simply say that you've been through a lot and that's the reason why you're the way that you are. You can turn things around if you want to, which is why I say don't pass someone up who is amazing because of their imperfections.


He or she is crazy or a detriment to your health.


If they are not, then give it a go


He or she ain't willing to work on their shiznit.

'Cause if that's the case, you're in for a chaotic and bumpy ride. No lie.

Maybe, in a way,

we're all cars.
Loose screws.
Squeaky breaks.
Broken windows.
Mucho miles and tons of scrapes.
Some of us run better than others,
Or look a little flashier.
but, in the end...we all got an
Honk, honk.

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