Wednesday, May 13, 2009

Dating - Top 10 - "Check, Please!"

Top 10 Reasons
Why I'd Say
"Check, Please!"


1) Turns out she has three kids my age and wants a younger woman so that they'll have someone to go clubbin' with.
2) Has five best friends and they are all ex-girlfriends.
3) "Whisper voice" sounds like Naomi Campbell when she yells at her assistant for breathing too loudly.
4) Only eats seven times a week.
5) Drivers License says she's 41 but she acts 14.
6) Has really amazing parents but refuses to talk to them because they didn't give her a down payment for that 3 million dollar home she wanted.
7) Armpits look like Chewbacca crawled and died in 'em.
8) Believes animals and alone time belong in the grave with Hitler.
9) The last time she cried was when she was a baby.
10) Instead of going to church, she has an orgy every Sunday.

We all have our reasons for getting up and leaving the table (so to speak) on someone. Now, the hard part, is not going back for another bite because the person looks good, etc. I talk a lot of game, but dang, sometimes I just wanna go back for more even when I know the food ain't worth the price. Even when I know I will have to work off the calories in some way, and at times, it'll take months to work off.

Why do we date someone who we know is bad for us? Is it a compulsive need to try to find a sense of wholeness in us. Is it because it's easy. Or, that we know we can control whether or not we're vulnerable. I think it depends on the person, but I do know that a pretty face will always have me thinking twice. But, at times, I am very good at walking away and never going back to that restaurant...to that table --

One time I had a crush on a woman who was attracted to me. She'd flirt with me all of the time, which felt hella nice (duh). I would see her out and wave at her. But, then she told me she had drama with someone else and at that point I realized 1) she's unavailable and 2) knowing her would be like a roller coaster and 3) I had to stop talking to her for my own sake. So, that's exactly what I did. Took her off my facebook friends list. Stopped flirting with her. And, when I saw her out, I'd simply wave from a distance. I knew where that road was headin' so I decided to take a different route...and to sit at a different table.

Which brings me to the point of, we're all a work in progress. Sometimes we make mistakes and sometimes we don't. Sometimes we cause drama and sometimes we don't. Yeah, I'm consistent 90 percent of the time, but that 10 percent is what can get me into trouble. I think it's important to always learn, grow, and be patient with ourselves. Not to be too harsh of a critic with our actions, but to always look at them with a compassionate eye. We will hurt others inevitably, and others will hurt us. We will love. We will hate. We will cry. We will make others cry. Let's grow together, shall we? We're all the same height anyway.

Gotta go make a reservation.

1 comment:

mc_cool said...

how tall are u and what church do u go to?